Mom announced that she was making eclairs for dessert, so I invited friends from the debate team home for dinner.

Mom served meatloaf and then she said, "Guess what?"

No one answered.

"Dad and I decided to have another baby."

I said, "Yeah, right."

Dad said, "We're not joking."

Mom said, "We didn't plan it. It just sort of happened that one night we forgot to use a rubber. And now we're thinking that a baby might help us to get along better."

Everyone stopped eating. Well, everyone except Dad. Mom had her hands in her lap and a glow in her eyes.

I said, "Mom, it's old-fashioned to call it a rubber." Then I threw up. On my plate. On my friend. On the floor.

One of my friends cleaned up. Then my friends left, and I went with them.

We piled into the car and just before we pulled away, I yelled out the window, "Mom! Mom! You already have a kid who hates you. How can you have more kids?"

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